TLed by NolepGuy
Chapter 246
It was raining.
The rain, heavy with regret for the scars of unerasable memories, was falling between the two of them.
-Swoooosh.
Mikhail was looking at me.
With rain-soaked eyes, he stood there silently, staring at me.
His lips twitched as if he wanted to say something, but Mikhail shut his eyes tightly and his shoulders trembled.
“I…”
What could have happened?
Mikhail was trembling like a frightened person. He couldn’t meet my eyes properly and didn’t know where to place his quivering gaze.
I couldn’t know what had happened, but looking into Mikhail’s melancholy-filled eyes, I gave him a faint smile.
“Miss Misa.”
As always.
*
I couldn’t say anything.
“Miss Misa.”
I couldn’t respond to his question, asked in a Gentle Voice. I couldn’t even manage the simple word “Yes,” nor could I meet his eyes.
Mikhail couldn’t think of what to say, how to begin the conversation, so he couldn’t dare to open his mouth.
Those Scarlet Eyes staring at him.
Just knowing that the shoulders he had once hated belonged to that person made Mikhail’s heart ache.
-Swoooosh.
Ricardo, holding the Umbrella over my head while getting drenched himself, was smiling. He was showing me that same meaningless Smile I had once despised so much.
His heart ached.
It hurt so much… that it was hard to breathe properly.
“…I.”
What had I done?
“I…”
Who had I hated?
“I… I.”
Why had I done it?
A Tsunami of Regret, unbearable and overwhelming, was crashing down on me. Even if I wanted to deny it, the regret that gripped my heart wouldn’t let me.
Telling me not to speak carelessly.
Telling me, “What face do you have to lift your head?” My heart was pounding madly.
“Are you okay?”
Ricardo looked at me with eyes full of concern.
-Are you okay?
-Stop pretending to care; it’s disgusting.
-…Seeing you say that, it seems you’re fine.
His voice, along with the mistakes of the past, echoed in my ears.
“Miss Misa, you don’t look well. It’s pouring like this, and you’re without an Umbrella….”
-Are you a training maniac? It’s raining this hard, yet you’re still training?
-Don’t worry about it. It’s none of your business.
-Still.
-Don’t hold an Umbrella over me with those filthy hands…!
The Umbrella I had dropped on the ground back then flashed before my eyes.
Ricardo’s Pitying Expression overlapped with the image of that child from my memories. The child who always smiled at me and never spoke ill of me, their voice and Ricardo’s Smile overlapped.
At the Crossroads I had searched and wandered for so long, I had finally found the path. Not only had I found that the child had survived, but I also learned who he was and what goals he had been living for. Yet, I could only stand there silently, unable to say a word.
Mikhail couldn’t look Ricardo straight in the eyes.
Because the one who had expelled him from the Academy, where graduation guaranteed success, was none other than himself. Mikhail’s Past Self, who had spoken such harsh words to Ricardo, was so detestable to him.
“Why….”
There were so many things I wanted to ask.
Why someone as brilliant as you became Olivia’s Butler, why someone who showed mercy to an annoying Orphan turned into someone who bullied the Weak Person.
There were so many things I wanted to ask.
But Mikhail couldn’t bring himself to speak.
Perhaps.
“Why are you….”
Perhaps all of it had been for my sake. I couldn’t dare to speak.
“…”
Knowing that so much had been delayed to clear the emotional rift that had built up, everything felt so delicate.
He wouldn’t know. That’s why he hadn’t revealed his identity to me. Maybe he didn’t want to be a hindrance, or maybe he didn’t want to remain as someone who remembered his Slum Origin. If it was him, he would have done so.
‘…’
Memories of what Ricardo had done so far began to surface in my mind.
The time he deliberately lost to me in the Ranking Tournament.
-What are you doing…! Fight until the end.
-I thought it would suit you better.
-Are you mocking me?
The time during the Academy Fire when he stood outside and smiled brightly at me.
-Why are you smiling?
-I just feel relieved, that’s all.
The moment I realized that all the things I had hated were done for my sake, my heart felt like it was being torn to shreds.
‘I never said a single kind word to you.’
‘I told you I didn’t need your help.’
Realizing that he had silently helped me despite my Criticism, Mikhail couldn’t lift his head. The reflection of himself in the rainwater was too vile.
His trembling Fist clenched tightly.
His nails seemed to dig into his skin, but it didn’t hurt. His heart hurt more.
“Like that…”
The Ricardo in front of me was looking at me. Not as ‘Mikhail,’ The Man, but with eyes filled with concern for ‘Misa,’ the Woman.
I couldn’t know what emotions he held.
Whether he held positive emotions or negative emotions, I wanted to know, but I didn’t have the courage to ask.
Ricardo kept looking at me.
Even as his back was soaked from the rain, he gazed at me with a gentle Smile.
“Don’t look at me like that.”
Because if you knew who I was, you would hate me.
“Please, don’t look at me like that.”
Even though you know what I’ve done to you, how I treated you cruelly, pushed you away, cursed and insulted you. Why are you looking at me with eyes like that? Mikhail bit his lip and clenched his Fist.
It felt like his heart was about to Break Down.
His heart, beating madly, seemed to refuse to beat under the weight of guilt. It felt like it was Kicking Sound, saying, “You don’t deserve this. Think about what you said.”
‘Yes. I know.’
If Ricardo had spoken those words himself.
If he had lost control and exploded with anger, even this chance wouldn’t exist.
To see that face.
To see that Smile.
To hear his Voice.
Mikhail looked at Ricardo while wearing the Mask of Misa. Because the appearance of Mikhail, The Man, would be a Nightmare for Ricardo.
Even though this appearance was his true self, even though it was the form in which he most wanted to meet him, Mikhail faced Ricardo while wearing the Mask of Lies.
Because if Ricardo knew he was Mikhail, he didn’t know how Ricardo would react. Honestly, he was afraid.
Afraid of how he should treat him.
-Why have you suddenly become kind?
Afraid of how he should see him.
-Act as you always do. Tell me to get lost. Say you don’t need someone like me.
He feared being hurt by Ricardo’s cold demeanor. Even though what he had done was far worse.
I know that such thoughts are just pathetic excuses, but the fear of being hated by him was greater, so Mikhail decided to wear the Mask of Lies.
Ricardo, looking into Mikhail’s trembling eyes, opened his tightly closed lips.
“Did you ask why I look at you like that?”
-A Chuckle. Smiling faintly, Ricardo shaded Mikhail’s head with the Umbrella and spoke in a calm Voice.
“How could I just pass by when a Beauty stands miserably in the rain? I’m not capable of such neglect.”
“…”
Ricardo, smiling softly at the hesitant Mikhail, spoke.
“You said you were learning the sword, didn’t you?”
“…Yes.”
“Since I’m not often in the Capital City… if you come down to Hamel, I’ll teach you.”
“…”
“But don’t come to our Estate; make sure to leave a Letter. Something like, ‘I’ll come at this Time and to this Place, so please make time for me.'”
Ricardo looked around and spoke in a playful Voice.
“A fearsome Monster lives in our Estate… if you get caught, you’ll die.”
Mikhail nodded.
Tears welled up in his eyes.
Embracing the depth of emotions filled with regret, he nodded with a heavy heart.
Just having a way to talk to him was enough. Carrying the name Mikhail and approaching him was something unthinkable, so he thought this was all he could do—approach him wearing the Mask of Lies.
He knew this might not be the best way, and perhaps it was the worst choice, but Mikhail couldn’t let this opportunity slip away.
“Can I….”
“Yes.”
“Can I really do that?”
“Hmm…”
Ricardo placed the Umbrella in Mikhail’s hand and smiled.
“If you show a Token of Sincerity, it’s possible.”
Watching Mikhail lower his head, hidden by the Umbrella, Ricardo nodded and bid farewell.
“You’ll catch a Cold.”
“…”
“And don’t cry.”
‘Ah…’
For a moment, Ricardo’s face overlapped with the face of The Boy from his memories.
Just like that day when he handed over the Cardboard Box he was using to cover his head in the rain.
-Because you’ll look ugly. Don’t cry.
“Because you’ll look ugly. Don’t cry.”
It was the same.
After Ricardo disappeared from the Street.
-Thump.
Mikhail collapsed to the ground and cried endlessly.
Dropping the Umbrella onto the Street, he cried without restraint.
“Huhuh… Huaaah. I…”
“Now… hic… hic… huaaah.”
“Ah… I… what do I do now…”
Beating his chest endlessly, he burst into tears.
***
Today, Darvav’s Estate was peaceful as always.
“Father.”
“…It’s fine. Father will take care of everything.”
“Older Brother also permits it.”
“Mother will allow it too.”
Sitting on the floor, Olivia, who bore the Family’s Expectations, was picking her nose.
“Hmmph.”
Shaking One’s Head, Olivia spoke calmly.
“No. What if it fails again?”
“It’ll just lead to a demotion. Father values the present more than such things.”
“I’ve sent all the Servants away, so it’s fine. I’ve set up double and triple Barriers, and if someone enters, they’ll quietly bid farewell to this world without a trace, so it’s fine.”
“Mother will assist as well.”
I stopped the Young Lady’s hand as she brought her finger to her mouth and smiled.
“That’s not something you eat.”
“…It’s not?”
“No.”
“…”
The Young Lady smiled bashfully and nodded.
“Then, shall we try?”
The Desmond Family was filled with anticipation, watching the Young Lady roll up her sleeves.
“Eeeek!!!!”
They were waiting for Little Olivia.