Translator: Elisia
Editor/Proofreader: Wojo
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Lee Soo-ah felt just as uncomfortable about Yang Hye-in’s situation.
The reason was simple.
It was because her current situation was not much different from Yang Hye-in’s.
Of course, it wasn’t possible to completely compare the two situations.
Yang Hye-in, as a servant who always accompanied Sara, had actively participated in isolating her, while Lee Soo-ah was a more distant, indirect participant who merely turned a blind eye.
…No, that wasn’t it.
That wasn’t true at all.
In reality, the situations were entirely the same.
Yang Hye-in hadn’t “actively” tormented Sara either.
She had just, through endless indifference, gradually cornered her.
And such an act wasn’t something one could do alone.
To thoroughly isolate someone from society, from the world, it required everyone around that person to be united in heart and mind.
So, in the end, Lee Soo-ah was just as much of a perpetrator.
Ha-neul only met Sara this year, and the same was true for So-hee.
The two of them were among the few people around Sara now who had not wronged her.
In contrast, what about Lee Soo-ah herself?
…Wasn’t she one of the people who helped isolate Sara at school?
The reason didn’t matter.
In the end, Lee Soo-ah had believed that insignificant reason and participated in it.
Even the fact that she had changed her mind at the very end was no longer any real comfort.
…After all, the ‘Sara’ that Lee Soo-ah had known throughout middle school had been someone else entirely.
It was Sara who had accepted her greeting and taken a picture with her that day.
It’s not that she wasn’t happy about it.
Thanks to that, Lee Soo-ah was able to fully recognize her own mistakes and discover the direction she should take moving forward.
But despite everything that had happened, nothing had really been resolved.
If ‘Sara’ and the Sara in her mind thought differently, would the real ‘Sara’ be able to forgive Lee Soo-ah’s wrongdoings?
…She probably would.
But it would certainly be just like Yang Hye-in’s situation.
She would nod her head as if it didn’t really matter from the start, as if nothing had happened.
Would that really count as being “forgiven”?
…She had thought about repaying Sara, little by little, for the rest of her life.
…She believed that she was doing something for Sara in her own way.
But now, she finally understood what ‘Sara’ truly thought.
Would any of the things Lee Soo-ah had prepared even have any meaning?
Sara might be able to see Lee Soo-ah as a friend, but could ‘Sara’ see her as a friend?
To ‘Sara’, Lee Soo-ah had been just one of the many students who ostracized her for the past three years.
…If it were ‘Sara’, would she have been able to take that photo on that day?
“Why does everyone look so down?”
At ‘Sara’s’ words, Lee Soo-ah barely returned from her thoughts.
“We need to sort through everything one by one. Well, if you guys don’t want to help, I guess there’s nothing I can do—”
“I’ll help!”
At that, Lee Soo-ah shouted in a voice that even surprised herself.
“Hik!?”
Startled by her loud voice, ‘Sara’ looked at Lee Soo-ah with wide eyes.
Her eyes were just wide open in surprise, but that gaze felt different to Lee Soo-ah..
‘You?’
Of course, Lee Soo-ah must have seemed insignificant to ‘Sara’, and she couldn’t tell if she even had such thoughts.
“…Well, fine.”
After staring at Lee Soo-ah’s face for a moment, ‘Sara’ shrugged her shoulders and responded.
“Since Soo-ah says so, what about the rest of you?”
Although she casually bundled them as “the rest of you,” it seemed that this included Yang Hye-in, to whom Sara spoke formally.
Seeing that, Lee Soo-ah felt relieved.
And at the same time, she felt a terrible disgust toward herself.
Unlike Yang Hye-in, who had at least apologized, Lee Soo-ah had yet to offer a proper apology.
And yet the instant ‘Sara’ accepted her offer to help, she found herself feeling relieved.
No, this wasn’t right.
The sin was too great.
It wasn’t a sin that could be absolved with just a simple apology.
It wasn’t a sin that could be pushed onto someone else or excused away.
…Someday, she would have to offer a proper apology for that sin.
…Though she didn’t know if ‘Sara’ would forgive her for it, or even recognize it as a “sin.”
*
Hmm, everyone seems fired up.
It’s one thing for So-hee, Han Neul, and Soo-ah, but I didn’t expect even Yang Hye-in to be so motivated.
Perhaps it’s because of the way I’ve always seen her.
The Yang Hye-in I knew was always mechanical, aside from the occasional curious glance she sent my way.
…The fact that she’s suddenly this eager is a bit aggravating, but that’s something I can deal with later.
Honestly, it’s not like there’s some grand solution for it.
All I have to do is wait for her to calm down while resting in my mind.
That’s my job for now.
“Then, from now on, let’s do this.”
And while I’m at it, I might as well make sure she doesn’t have anything to worry about when she returns to my body.
What I’m thinking about would probably get me scolded in tonight’s dream.
I’m planning to cover up most of the problems and make sure no one ever brings them up again.
In some way, it might even feel like a bit of a betrayal to the person who’s worked so hard for me.
But, sorry.
I just don’t want to see you suffer.
Especially not because of me.
“First, Yang Hye-in.”
I called Yang Hye-in.
She, who had been slightly trembling with her head bowed, lifted her head at my words.
Her eyes were bloodshot, as if she might burst into tears at any moment, but no tears fell.
Quite the professional.
Well, after three years as my personal maid, always maintaining that expressionless face, she’ll probably continue to do well.
“From now on, cut off all contact with my mother.”
The first thing was to sever ties with my mother.
Of course, it wouldn’t be completely possible to sever them.
No matter what, she was still my mother.
Deep down in my heart, I was still waiting for the kind, gentle mother of my childhood.
That’s why, when So-hee gently hugged me earlier, my consciousness almost shifted.
If that subtle longing led me to meet my mother again, I would once again lose myself in the storm of emotions and cling to her.
The only reason I could speak so rationally now was that my emotions and memories had somewhat mixed with the other person’s.
Feelings and memories I didn’t have.
All of that filled the empty, hollow parts of my heart, preventing it from collapsing.
Whether intentional or not, that person had saved me like this.
And if I cut off this relationship, that person would surely respect my decision.
Even when I’m back inside, she would avoid meeting my mother.
“I understand.”
Yang Hye-in bowed without protest.
“Oh, and don’t say anything about quitting. From now on, you’re the manager of this estate again. If anyone says something or refuses to listen, just kick them out. After all, this house is mine, right?”
That person wouldn’t have gone this far, but I’m not kind enough to sit by and watch uninvited guests make noise in my own home.
Maybe I wouldn’t have as the old me, who couldn’t do anything about those people, but now that she’s put everything under control in this mansion, I’d feel bad if I didn’t make use of it.
“…Understood.”
I turned away from Yang Hye-in, who bowed deeply once again, and looked at So-hee, Ha-neul, and Soo-ah.
So-hee and Ha-neul had determined expressions.
…There’s no need to be so resolute.
It’s not like we’re planning to do something grand.
I just want to neatly wrap up the things she’s taken care of.
So that when she returns to her life, no one will interfere and mess things up.
So, it’s no longer such a difficult battle.
Above all, I now have these three people with me.
These new relationships that person has gifted me, to someone like me who once had only my mother.
Perhaps it’s thanks to her that I’m not longing for my mother at this moment.
That I’m able to trust someone.
However, among these three, there was one person whose reaction felt strangely out of place.
It was Soo-ah.
While the other two had “passionate” expressions, Soo-ah looked “melancholic.”
…Did my story make her that sad?
…Well, if you think about it, all three of them are competitors of mine in some way.
But they’re still friends.
Friends whose company makes me feel good.
So, I think I’ll have a proper conversation with Soo-ah sometime soon.