Chapter 381. The Time Has Come
‘It’ arrived like a midsummer night’s nightmare.
<[Exclusive] The New ‘King of Sports’ in the Idol World: ‘Achede’ Scheduled for August Filming>
– That scoundrel show is back, and it’s not dead yet.
The Chuseok Special Idol Athletics Championship.
This ruthless program, true to its name, gathers idols for a sports competition. It’s infamous for having NO appearance fee, NO waiting room, NO order, NO fun, NO benefits—a show where the only redeeming factor is the YES faces of the idols, and that’s how it has survived.
The recording sessions are painfully long, they don’t even provide food, movement is restricted, and the risk of injury is high. Even after all that, the airtime your favorite group gets might be as little as one second. In essence, idol fans regard it as the “ultimate in broadcasting exploitation.”
‘Still, there’s a reason why broadcasting stations cling to this format.’
The ratings are good.
Thanks to the universal appeal of sports, even adults with no interest in idols can easily tune in. Also, with multiple idol groups from different generations gathered in one place—something that rarely happens unless their schedules overlap—it’s easy to capture the attention of young audiences in their teens and twenties.
And, it costs nothing.
For the idols, the “reward” is the opportunity to appear on a prime holiday special on a national network and foster good relations with the network. For the fans, the “reward” is a chance to watch their idols’ sports competition for free.
As for the cost of the sports equipment? It’s almost nothing compared to a set that costs hundreds of thousands of dollars.
From the broadcaster’s perspective, Achede is the perfect cash cow—a no-cost, high-rating show.
“From the idol’s point of view, though, this is an absolute headache.”
The first event at Kairos’s new and spacious dorm was an emergency strategy meeting for Achede.
With the group becoming more popular, the members gathered in the much larger living room compared to our last dorm, looking at me with bright eyes. I pointed to the PowerPoint on the wall-mounted TV, holding a magic wand firmly in my right hand.
<The Day of the Great Idol Showdown>
“This is important, so underline it. Achede—it may sound like a sports competition, but in reality, it’s just an idol showdown. Got it?”
“…”
“Normally, fans are at war within their own bubbles, switching between hiatuses and promotion periods. But this brings them all together in one place for over 12 hours to show off and compare each other’s fanbases.”
“…Alright, calm down. Why are you so worked up?”
Seo Taehyun gestured for me to relax as I spoke with heated emotions. Taking a breath, I continued.
“From the size and placement of banners, the gifts fans give to other fans, the number of visits to fan sections, and how close you are with members of other groups—it all becomes a matter of comparison.”
To be honest, with our comeback in September, I would have preferred to just show up, flash our faces, and leave without much effort. But that wasn’t going to be easy.
Because…
“Most male idol groups in our tier will be there. One slip-up, and our fanbase could easily leak to another group.”
I flipped to the next slide, showing a list of confirmed participating male idol groups.
<Spear (only some members), Lanion, Stormheader, Wintertail, Phase, Enderway, Saint, Believer, Palmtree Boys…>
“Especially you, Seo Taehyun! You better stay alert; enemies surround you.”
Among the participating groups were Lanion, with Cha Minseok, and several spin-off groups from Boyhood, including Billight. Seo Taehyun nodded with a slightly sour expression, clearly aware of the situation.
“Well, they’re not exactly enemies…”
“They may not be, but none of them are people you’d want to get tangled up with. Make sure to bring two bodyguards with you even when you go to the bathroom.”
“Bodyguards? At Achede? That’d be so embarrassing.”
“Take Joo Eunchan and Lee Yugeon with you. Stick close to them, and don’t let yourself get dragged into challenges or anything. Got it? Understood?”
I was particularly worried about Taehyun because he had already made a lot of connections through his regular gig as a music show MC. Idol friendships could be great material when things were going well, but they could turn into poison in an instant.
And honestly, with what I’d heard about those Boyhood spinoff guys, it seemed like the best approach was to avoid getting involved at all.
“You’re going to have people trying to act all friendly with you. Even though Cha Minseok has kept his distance lately, you’ll still need to be careful…”
“I get it, I get it. I won’t have the energy to stray from the members anyway.”
After my repeated warnings, Taehyun nodded in agreement once more. He was a smart guy, so I trusted that he had gotten the message by now.
I moved on to the next slide. We still had a lot to cover.
“Alright, now let’s come up with ideas for what to give fans as gifts, and let’s decide which events we’ll participate in. Keep in mind, our goal is not to win.”
At that, the two youngest members, driven by their competitive spirits, along with the naturally sporty bear, flinched.
I gritted my teeth and repeated myself, enunciating each word clearly.
“Our goal is NOT to win. Got it?”
“…Yes.”
Joo Eunchan nodded reluctantly, though he looked unsatisfied. Lee Doha remained silent, but I trusted that he’d handle things well on his own, so I didn’t push it further.
“Achede airs in September. And when’s our comeback? Also September. So what’s more important to us? Of course, the comeback, right? That’s why our top priority is absolute safety and avoiding injury.”
“…”
“That said, the last runner for the 400-meter relay will be Seo Taehyun.”
“What? Why me?”
“Because that way, we can kiss goodbye to any hope of a miraculous comeback and approach the event in a relaxed, fun mode.”
“…”
“While other groups boast their Usain Bolts, we’ll leisurely enjoy Taehyun’s runway performance. Any objections?”
At that moment, Jung Siwoo, who had been calmly listening in the back, raised his hand.
“Siwoo hyung, go ahead.”
“Then I’ll be the starter.”
“You, hyung?”
“Yeah. As the first runner, I’ll get the most camera time.”
“Good point. This is the perfect chance to showcase your face to the entire idol world.”
Since Jung Siwoo’s beauty had reached another level after dyeing his hair silver, the idea of him getting extended camera time was satisfying.
And in the same vein, there was another person who needed some prime camera time.
“Joo Eunchan.”
“Yes?”
“You’re doing archery.”
### 381. The Time Has Come
“…Me?”
“Won’t Eunchan break the bow?”
“It’s fine. What’s important is the camera’s one-shot when you shoot.”
Once again, let me emphasize—what matters to us is the face.
Keeping in mind the timeless truth that Nam Daun taught me at the Miro Maze Sports Day, I waved the magic wand at Dan Haru, who had been acting indifferent, as if this wasn’t his problem.
With a cheeky twinkle sound, soap bubbles shot out from the tip of the wand, attacking Dan Haru’s face.
“What the… what are you doing?!”
“Sparkling.”
“…?”
“You have a special individual mission.”
“Me?”
Dan Haru furrowed his brow, sounding confused. I withdrew the wand and pointed it at a word on the PPT displayed on the TV.
<Stormheader>
“A special mission for the youngest.”
“…?”
“Make a friend.”
“…Wait, what am I, a…”
Dan Haru almost said, “A kid?” but stopped himself, realizing his current physical age was indeed 18.
“Anyway, you all understand, right? Unlike Touch High, we don’t need to try hard for screen time at Achede this time. Just go and have fun with the Destis. Even if you manage to grab
some MVP title or extra screen time, all you’ll gain is becoming the number one target for next year’s Achede. There’s no, absolutely no, benefit.”
I reiterated, packing all the necessary points tightly, almost as if brainwashing the members.
“Networking? Avoid it at all costs. Fan service? As much as possible. For fan gifts, think of it as preparing your child’s first picnic lunch. Take it easy with the sports, and breeze through the recording. Our goal is to stay low-key. Got it?”
“Yes—.”
The members answered in unison like elementary school students in class.
Despite emphasizing this again and again, I didn’t actually think we’d be able to quietly slip through unnoticed. If the past experiences with Kairos and variety shows were any indication, nothing ever went by smoothly.
This was our first group broadcast with other idol groups, except for year-end stages.
Whether it would bring good luck or bad luck, the scale of this event was completely different.
‘Please, just let us get through this quietly…’
But, as always, things never went as smoothly as they should.
—
The long-awaited Achede filming day arrived.
From the very start, I could tell there was no such thing as “quiet” for Kairos when it came to variety shows.
“Alright, Kairos, please make your entrance!”
Maybe it was because so many idols were gathered in one place, but Achede even had a red-carpet-style entrance with a photo op. Idols, dressed in their team uniforms, made a grand entrance to express their determination for the day, and because they lined us up by seniority, we entered early.
“Shall we go? Time to head out?”
“Let’s go, quickly.”
“Yugeon hyung, what are you thinking?”
“Just wondering what kind of witty headline they’ll come up with this time.”
“I’m going first, follow slowly.”
“Watch out for the stairs ahead.”
“I have a feeling that sports events and we don’t mix well…”
With Joo Eunchan’s gloomy last remark, we lined up and walked toward the photo zone.
As we emerged down the grand entrance path, decorated as if it were for an actual sports event, I could see the half-asleep journalists hurriedly grabbing their cameras, probably because it was so early in the morning.
“Yes, from This Isn’t Carol to the recent No Spring, they’re considered the group revolutionizing the new generation of male idols! It’s Kairos! Since they have a member with a sports background, we’re really excited to see what they’ll show us at Achede today!”
The emcee’s unnecessarily grand introduction was embarrassing.
As we stepped onto the photo zone, the sound of camera shutters clicked rapidly, accompanied by cheerful laughter from the reporters.
Soon, the variety show host, upon seeing us, burst out laughing and added a comment.
“Ah, the epitome of intense charisma, Kairos! Is today’s concept baby chicks? Your yellow team uniforms are just too cute!”
Of all the options…
Why, out of all the colors, did we end up with bright yellow chick uniforms?
Still, this was within the expected range. Nothing too extreme.
With an enlightened smile and a resigned expression, I gave a thumbs-up and responded.
“…Kairos is known for its suffocating cuteness. We lean towards a core of cuteness.”
Rip—
At the same moment, there was an ominous sound coming from beside me, where Lee Doha was lifting his arm to wave at the camera.
“…?”
“…Oh.”
I turned my head in disbelief, only to find Doha standing there, looking dumbfounded as he stared at his raised arm and his right shoulder. The seam of his yellow sports uniform, which had already seemed precarious, had completely torn, exposing his muscular bicep.
The poor-quality finishing of the uniform was obvious, even to the naked eye.
Click click click click click click click click click click—
‘…Just listen to those shutter clicks.’
The flashes and camera clicks were overwhelming.
Thus, the glorious return of the cute yet intimidating yellow team was underway.