“I don’t want to enter Gates for a while.”
Han Seo-hyeon shuddered after returning to the base.
Since his first Gate conquest ended so terribly, he says he might break out in hives just hearing the word Gate.
What can I do? It seems like you’ll have to enter Gates with me to conquer them quite often in the future.
I repeated the words the woman had left. She said there were such special Gates here and there. Gates are fragments of destroyed worlds. While their fate can’t be changed, their impact on this world could be different.
If only that bastard Yoo Seon-je hadn’t interfered, we could have seen how this world would change according to the altered conquest.
—To find that out, we’ll have to go conquer another Gate.
‘The problem is there’s no guarantee we’ll find such a Gate again.’
Recklessly investigating Gates doesn’t seem right. But if we ignore them, the benefits of solving the Gate puzzle are tantalizing.
Anyway, for now I didn’t want to even look at Gates as Han Seo-hyeon said, but it seemed we couldn’t completely ignore Gates either.
I guess the problem is that we can’t enter Gates to conquer them through normal methods in Korea.
Even this time, you could say we snatched Sirius’ Gate.
‘I’ll have to think about it slowly later.’
When Gate news comes, I should try poking at it. Or maybe this time I could go overseas to conquer a Gate. Surely I won’t meet Taika Cooper again then.
After organizing the plans in my head step by step, I shifted my gaze.
I saw Kim Jae-ho hugging the rabbit doll I had newly bought him.
Ah, that doll was something I bought on the way back as an apology.
I gave it to him when Kim Jae-ho was about to throw a tantrum after finishing the forced shower (Han Seo-hyeon said what I did was closer to waterboarding, but I insisted it was a shower), and as you can see, the effect was amazing.
Kim Jae-ho, who had been acting like he would crush me, became a gentle lamb again.
—He really acts in a way that doesn’t match his size.
‘He’s still only sixteen…’
I recalled that shocking fact again. To think he’s sixteen with that huge body and fierce face. Well, even though he looks like that, he’s still young. Although he can pop people’s heads with one punch, and break all their ribs with one hug…
He was still a child who likes dolls.
—No, even at sixteen, people don’t usually like dolls like that.
‘He didn’t have time for his mental age to grow.’
He’s crazy about dolls now, but in a few years he might grow up rapidly and deny his current past, right? Kim Jae-ho going through puberty. Just thinking about it is scary. I wonder if he’ll slam doors, talk back saying things like ‘What have you ever done for me?’, ‘Boss, you don’t understand my feelings!’, ‘Don’t meddle in my business!’
‘I’ve decided. If Kim Jae-ho goes through puberty, I’ll go through a midlife crisis around that time.’
—What are you talking about?
‘I’m saying if Kim Jae-ho goes through puberty, I plan to run away from home due to a midlife crisis.’
Alright, it’s a perfect plan.
—Sounds like perfect nonsense to me.
Since I bought him a new doll, I wanted to throw away the old dirty doll I gave him before, but the greedy Kim Jae-ho bared his teeth and threw a tantrum as soon as I tried to touch the old doll.
I thought he had become more human lately, but he was still closer to a dog than a person.
I looked around the base.
‘Come to think of it, after not seeing it for a while, somehow…’
—It looks even worse.
It certainly looked worse after not seeing it for a while. Is it because we just saw that ice palace that was the epitome of splendor until recently? Looking at our base that wasn’t even properly finished, it really felt that way.
And it seems I wasn’t the only one who felt that way.
Han Seo-hyeon said to me:
“By the way, how long are we going to leave our base like this?”
“Isn’t this kind of interior trendy these days? Industrial interior or something?”
“I don’t know about that, but it just looks like an abandoned house.”
As expected of Han Seo-hyeon. Merciless.
‘Hmm, should we properly finish the base for now?’
It’s not like I didn’t try to decorate the base. I even applied putty on the bricks and painted them. But that alone wasn’t enough to meet the strict system’s standards.
Our base was still B-grade.
Even though I made such a fuss to remove the phrase ‘Grade lowered due to poor finishing skills’ in the item window, that phrase was still stuck like gum.
At first, I thought that phrase appeared because I didn’t properly finish the walls. But even after finishing, that phrase didn’t disappear.
If the grade is determined by including all the interior, it certainly makes sense.
Except for the sofa, dining table, and chairs I hurriedly bought while taking care of the children, our base was still empty.
After secretly donating even the things the children used to nearby orphanages, really nothing was left.
“Why is it so empty? I guess we need furniture and such after all?”
At my muttering, Han Seo-hyeon exclaimed in horror:
“Surely you’re not thinking of making a fuss about making furniture yourself again?”
Sadly, my plan to make furniture myself failed miserably.
I thought I could just roughly cut wood, dry it, and nail it together, but it turned out to be harder than I thought.
The completion level was so terrible that the system didn’t even recognize it as a finished product.
“Can’t we just buy furniture from IKEA or something?”
“If we go to a villain base and it’s full of IKEA furniture, wouldn’t that look a bit off?”
At my words, Han Seo-hyeon said mercilessly:
“I think this looks even more off.”
At the tip of Han Seo-hyeon’s finger was the pile of wood I had claimed was a chair. The reason it failed to become a chair is simple. It broke as soon as someone sat on it.
Ahem, at a loss for words, I just cleared my throat.
“Actually, isn’t part of the reason our base is so gloomy because of us?”
I looked over our organization.
Let’s see, first a necromancer who drags around undead.
A modified human hulk covered in scars who can handle shadows.
Me, a sycophant who used to leech off corrupt politicians.
And one old soul from another dimension.
Isn’t this a combination that simply can’t be bright no matter what?
—Wait, what did you say?
Hearing my words, Han Seo-hyeon shouted:
“But Boss, you only bought us black clothes because we’re a criminal organization!”
“Hmm, that’s right. Seo-hyeon is not at fault.”
Let’s just say this is all Ray’s fault.
—I’m not even visible in the first place! How on earth am I making your base dark!
‘In that you’re in a mascot position but not cute at all? In that you’re an old fogy?’
Right, I know what our base is lacking. A mascot! There’s a reason the cat appears in The Godfather. Even next to a terrifying villain that everyone fears, you need something cute to neutralize the atmosphere!
—What use is such a furry creature? Don’t you already have several furry creatures?
As Ray said, it’s not like our base is completely without furry creatures. Just that they’re undead that glow red eyes and ooze dark magic.
‘Those don’t count as mascots.’
—I don’t see the difference.
Other villains easily get cute mascots, but I’m stuck with an old soul from another dimension.
Unfortunately, we can’t create a non-existent mascot right away.
—For now, if you just repaint those damn walls you painted all black saying villain bases should be dark, it would be much better than now.
‘That’s not possible.’
Black walls are the foundation of a villain base. I just barely covered the brown bricks with putty and painted them all black, and now you want me to cover that with a different color?
—Damn it, how can you talk about atmosphere like this? Just live in this gloomy place!
Is it because we don’t have a mascot after all?
—I’m telling you the problem is that all the walls are pitch black!
Maybe it’s because we lack lighting.
—What’s the point of adding lighting when all the walls are pitch black!
No, I think the problem is that it’s empty after all.
“I guess I’ll have to make furniture again. It’ll be much better if we fill the inside. Definitely.”
Next time, I’ll make a proper chair for sure. I’ll make a desk too, and a display cabinet. Seeing my worries, Han Seo-hyeon sighed and said:
“Just go to IKEA.”
I deliberately ignored that voice. If I keep trying hard, my skills will improve someday, right?
—From what I see, your handiness is really not good. It’s better to just give up…
‘Giving up is just a unit for counting cabbages.’
I was burning with enthusiasm.
“Wait, Seo-hyeon. I’ll make you a chair to use.”
“I don’t need it…”
A rejection is a rejection.
* * *
It was when I came out to eat lunch after making furniture. When I opened the door, I blinked in surprise.
“W-what is this?”
There was Han Seo-hyeon with a blank expression, sticking a 30cm candle into a pile of snacks stacked high.
“Boss! Today is your birthday! H-happy birthday.”
“Ah.”
Was it already January 20th? Kim Jae-ho standing behind Han Seo-hyeon belatedly set off firecrackers.
With a bang, sparkling paper showered over my head.
“Wooow!”
“Wooow, congratulations.”
At the somewhat awkward congratulations, I also smiled awkwardly. To think they would even remember my birthday.
“By the way, how did you know my birthday when I never mentioned it?”
“Oh, I saw it on the wanted poster.”
Hmm… I see. A wanted poster. The best way to find out someone’s birthday.
“Anyway, thank you.”
I reluctantly accepted the cake (or rather, the pile of snacks Han Seo-hyeon claimed was a cake). I blew out the candle too. It’s a secret that I used mana to blow wind because the emergency candle wouldn’t go out easily.
“I’m sorry it’s just this.”
“No, this is the best birthday I’ve had in a long time.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
—Well, you did say you’re from an orphanage. It makes sense there wouldn’t be anyone to celebrate your birthday.
‘No, even when I was at the orphanage, there was always someone who celebrated my birthday. That Jeong Ho-san guy acted like he would die if he missed my birthday.’
From when I lived at the orphanage, Jeong Ho-san always celebrated my birthday.
Though it wasn’t as fancy as other children’s birthdays, the time I spent alone with Jeong Ho-san wasn’t too bad.
Even without a cake, with just one secretly hidden candy as a birthday gift, I could smile thanks to him.
His very existence, telling me he was glad I was born, was like a birthday gift to me.
—Then?
‘It’s because of Seol Rok-jin.’
He was quite a good master, so he always wanted to celebrate the birthday of his beloved pet.
—I get that the guy is trash, but isn’t he rich trash? If he celebrated your birthday, I would think he’d buy you something expensive. How could that be bad?
‘Ah, of course he gave me money too. But Seol Rok-jin thought such ordinary things were boring. He planned special events for my birthday every time.’
I slowly recalled the memories.
The first birthday party I had with Seol Rok-jin.
Ah, that was really.
The worst.